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CollectionsA very bad movie
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 12 January 2011 12:52
(A review of Alone in the Dark)Uwe Boll's (bad) reputation as the worst director ever was growing each year so I was really getting curious about his work so I had to watch one of his movies. Oh, my god... I wasn't disappointed or maybe the opposite, I was very disappointed, depends how you put it... Anyway, Uwe Boll really deserves the title of "Worst movie director alive".... As a matter of fact, I must admit that the first half was actually almost watchable. I mean, it was still pretty average but there was some B qualities to it, seriously. However, something went really wrong and the second half was probably the worst thing I have ever seen. I mean, the whole thing didn't make any sense anymore, it was ugly as hell and completely boring. I mean, I have seen my share of piece of sh*t movies but it was really something. The weird thing is that seven years later, Uwe Boll is still making movies (usually up to two every year...) and I wonder if those are making any money. There is some kind of morbid attraction to those movies ('Let's check out his next piece of trash!') but I'm proud to say I only saw two of his. To conclude, it is definitely one of the worst movies ever made and it is absolutely not worth a look whatsoever.
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A very bad movie
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 12 January 2011 12:44
(A review of Ballistic: Ecks vs. Sever)Maybe you have noticed, but from time to time, I tend to watch some major garbage. This time, since I heard so many bad things about this flick, I really had to check it to find out myself. Indeed, it was a massive flop at the box-office and it has the dubious honor of being ranked number 1 on the site āRotten Tomatoesā among āThe Worst of the Worst movie list where the film managed to reach a 0% ārottenā rating. Apparently, the director Wych Kaosayananda made āFahā, his previous directing effort, in his homeland Thailand and it was the highest budgeted film in the country's history. It became a big hit and led him to direct this huge mess. With this in mind, I was obviously not expecting much and, eventually, it was indeed the worst action movie I have ever seen. Basically, the action scenes were worthless, the story didnāt make any sense and the whole thing was just completely boring from the beginning until the end. It is one of those very rare examples of a movie which is so bad, it is not even fun anymore, it is just embarrassing to watch. To conclude, there is no reason why you should watch this flick and you should probably avoid it.
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A bad movie
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 12 January 2011 12:22
(A review of Raise Your Voice)Honestly, I may have to raise up the rating for this movie up to a 4 since most of the movies I have seen with Hilary Duff didn't end up with such a low rating. But then, it would require a re-watch and I'm maybe stupid but not that stupid and I have definitely better things to do... Anyway, the first time I watched this, it was with my step-daughter who was 13-14 years old back then. Of course, I had some very low expectations but I did't expect it to be so bad (and it is probably why it ended up with such a low rating). I mean, This story has already been made like 1000 times before, way better and entertaining than here and they didn't add anything to the formula. Furthermore, I have nothing against Hilary Duff, she is quite charming and she may have some potential (not so sure though...) but, as an actress, she is a total bore to watch. By now, I have seen a few Hilary Duff flicks but it is easily the worst one I have seen so far ... Personally, I think this movie was completely boring but if you're a 12 year old girl, it may be bareable, who knows ?!? To conclude, I don't think it is worth a look at all, and you should probably avoid it.
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A very bad movie
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 12 January 2011 11:51
(A review of Thomas and the Magic Railroad)As you may have noticed, Iām pretty obsessive concerning my movie watching. As a result, I end up watching the most obscure and worst garbage you can imagine just because one actor appears to be involved in this misguided mess. This time, I ended up watching this dreadful flick just because there was Alec Baldwin in it. I also thought it could be a nice watch for my step-son... Eventually, it turned out to be a huge mistake! I mean, Iām well aware that Iām far from being the target audience but pretty much like the TV show itself, I thought it was pretty abysmal. When watching this, you really wonder who thought that it was a good idea to make a full length version of this family show. Maybe it was a huge success back in those days? Anyway, the whole thing just looked awful and it was just very very very bad, completely boring and embarrassing to watch. I guess it maybe nice for very young children (up to 5 years) but otherwise it is a complete waste of time. To conclude, I didnāt like this flick at all and I donāt think it is worth a look whatsoever.
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A very bad movie
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 12 January 2011 11:46
(A review of My Little Pony: The Movie)Honestly, I wasnāt expecting much from this flick but, somehow, I still ended up watching it. Indeed, I have a 4 years old daughter, we had this flick on DVD and she really wanted to see this. So I put it on and, to my surprise, I noticed that Danny De Vito was in the opening credits so I thought I might check the damned thing after all. Oh boy, that was a big mistake... The only reason it doesn't get the lowest score it's because it is a movie for kids but even so, I still think it was completely worthless... Did they seriously release this in the theater? I hope not. Basically, like most of the TV cartoons adapted on the silver screen, they didnāt make the effort of upgrading a little bit the animation, so the whole thing looked terribly awful and cheap as hell. Of course, you could argue that kids donāt care about such trivial things but is it really a reason to rip them off or their parents?!? I always find it annoying that they donāt take children seriously as an audience. I mean, it is not because they are innocent and that they would watch pretty much anything that you should take advantage of them. To conclude, it was lame and ugly and you should definitely watch something else with your children.
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The worst movie ever made
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 12 January 2011 11:31
(A review of Cool as Ice)As you might have noticed, I actually never give a '1' rating. Indeed, I just love movies and I believe that most of them actually have one or two redeeming features and therefore warranting a '2' or a '3' rating. I mean, only the fact that probably 100 people worked hard deliver any bad movie makes it really difficult for me to complete trash any movie. Anyway, there are still a handful of movies which were so awful, I couldn't find anything remotely positive about them and this flick, this abomination, is actually the very worst one I have ever seen. I remember exactly when I saw it, I rent it on video back then because I thought that Vanilla Ice was cool (give me a break... I was just twelve years old at the time). Anyway, in spite of my young age, I was still able to figure out that it was a huge piece of turd... Ā Seriously, the whole thing was just abysmal. The story, the directing, the acting, everything was just so bad. You have to watch it to believe it. Or maybe not... To conclude, the whole thing is a huge waste of time and it is not worth a look whatsoever, except maybe if you want to see how bad it actually is.
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Whatever...
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 12 January 2011 09:18
(A review of Breath)Honestly, Kim Ki-Duk must be one of the most frustrating directors I know. I mean, the guy has a pretty good reputation and I keep watching his flicks but, it is already the 4th movie of his that I watched and it is already a 4th disappointment... Eventually, none of them succeeded in really blowing me away, except for āBin-jipā which was pretty good though but even this movie didnāt really completely convince me. At least, this time, the whole thing had more potential than āHwalā, so far the most difficult to swallow from this director that I have seen so far, but I still canāt say it really worked for me. I mean, sure, it was well directed and acted but I just didn't feel much for this story. As usual with this director, there must have been some kind of deep symbolical/philosophical/bouddhistical/whatever meaning to it but even if someone might try to Ā explain it to me in details, I'm not sure I would enjoy more this movie anyway. To conclude, with Kim Ki-Duk, I keep trying and trying, I guess he is really an acquired taste but I have to admit that this movie is still worth a look, especially if you are interested in this directorās work.Ā
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An average movie
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 12 January 2011 08:07
(A review of Babette's Feast)The main reason I wanted to check it out was because it was included in the ā1001 Movies You Must See Before You Dieā list. Furthermore, it has a impressive 7.9 rating on IMDb and it also won the Oscar for the Best Foreign Language Film. So, it seemed to have a pretty good reputation and I was really eager to check it out. Well, to be honest, it is not very often that I see such an heralded feature turning out to be so unappealing to me. I mean, obviously, it was not bad at all but I just had a really hard time to connect with the damned thing. At least, I really loved this scene at the beginning with this duo between one of the girls and some French singer. Seriously, it was amazing and one of the most beautiful musical scenes I have witnessed in a movie. It was pretty awesome but unfortunately, that's about the only thing that I really loved with this movie. I mean, sure, Ā it was all well done and acted but, in my opinion, the message of this movie was basically ādon't worry if you waste your whole life, there is still a chance that God welcome you in heavenā and it was seriously difficult to swallow. To conclude, even though I didnāt care much about this movie, I have to admit that it I still worth a look, especially if you like the genre.Ā
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A very good movie
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 11 January 2011 05:56
(A review of Six Degrees of Separation)Not so long ago, Will Smith was without a doubt the king of the box-office. After taking a 4 year break after āHancockā, he still managed to get a hit with āMen In Black 3ā while most of us thought it would flop terrible but, a year later, he made the very dubious decision to make a movie with the infamous M. Night Shyamalan but āAfter Earthā turned out to be a huge failure, critically and financially, and his reign was finally ended. Anyway, in my opinion, his box-office success actually always overshadowed the fact that he might be actually a pretty decent actor. Indeed, if you think Will Smith is a bad actor, you should definitely check this flick. To start with, it is, in my opinion, quite a fascinating story and Smith gave his best perfomance until further notice, even better than in 'Ali', 'The Pursuit of Happyness' or 'Seven Pounds'. The point is that Will Smith has never played before or after such a deep and complex character and the mix with his natural charisma was just quite mesmerizing to behold. Anyway, I think it is an underrated gem and it is definitely worth a look, especially if you want to see something completely different starring Will Smith.
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A very good movie
Posted : 14 years, 5 months ago on 11 January 2011 01:11
(A review of The Funeral)Back in the 90's, I was a huge fan of Abel Ferrara so I was really eager to check this movie out. Unfortunately, Ferrara doesn't really make very good movies anymore... But this one is definitely worth a look! First of all, there was an impressive cast (Christoher Walken, Benicio del Toro, Chris Penn, Annabella Sciorra, Isabella Rossellini, Vincent Gallo, Gretchen Mol) and the directing was rather amazing. For once with this director, the story was actually rather accessible and, in the 2000's, his movies would become increasingly murky and obscure and barely watchable. His next project would be 'The Blackout' which did get some buzz because it was involving Claudia Schiffer and BĆ©atrice Dalle. Well, in spite of the fact that Dalle did a lot of coke, got caught by the police and is now as a result banned for ever from the USA, nothing really interesting happened with this movie and it was in fact really weak and boring. Instead, I would suggest to watch this dark crime story which was may be more straightforward but it was much more rewarding to watch, I'll guarantee you that. To conclude, I really loved this movie and you should definitely check this one out, especially if you are interested in Abel Ferrara 's work.
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